Dear Friends, Readers and Indifferents,
After my experience tonight at the Curious Cafe, I have decided I am not fit to be a poet. Getting the same score as the “mock poet” or sacrificial lamb at the beginning of the slam opened my eyes to the fact that I cannot write, and in fact, should not. Therefore, this is the last piece of writing you will ever receive from me. Perhaps more poignantly, tonight demonstrated to me that I am unfit for human company. In light of this, I am emigrating to Mexico, where I will sequester myself in the dry and dusty hills and live off grubs and roots. I plan to spend the majority of my days squatting, naked and filthy, in a corner, where I will rock, mouth nonsense words, and throw ashes on my head. Please forward all correspondence to:
That Unspeakable Loser
666 Snowball Lane,
Thank you for your infinite patience with what has obviously been my plague of words. So long. Good bye. I mean it. Seriously.
In the meantime, buy my book: www.lulu.com/sharpNpencil